Is There Life After Work?

AT an office party in 2005, one of my colleagues asked my then husband what I did on weekends. She knew me as someone with great intensity and energy. “Does she kayak, go rock climbing and then run a half marathon?” she joked. No, he answered simply, “she sleeps.” And that was true. When I wasn’t catching up on work, I spent my weekends recharging my batteries for the coming week. Work always came first, before my family, friends and marriage — which ended just a few years later.

In recent weeks I have been following with interest the escalating debate about work-life balance and the varying positions of Facebook’s Sheryl Sandberg, Marissa Mayer of Yahoo and the academic Anne-Marie Slaughter, among others. Since I resigned my position as chief financial officer of Lehman Brothers in 2008, amid mounting chaos and a cloud of public humiliation only months before the company went bankrupt, I have had ample time to reflect on the decisions I made in balancing (or failing to balance) my job with the rest of my life. The fact that I call it “the rest of my life” gives you an indication where work stood in the pecking order.

I don’t have children, so it might seem that my story lacks relevance to the work-life balance debate. Like everyone, though, I did have relationships — a spouse, friends and family — and none of them got the best version of me. They got what was left over.

I didn’t start out with the goal of devoting all of myself to my job. It crept in over time. Each year that went by, slight modifications became the new normal. First I spent a half-hour on Sunday organizing my e-mail, to-do list and calendar to make Monday morning easier. Then I was working a few hours on Sunday, then all day. My boundaries slipped away until work was all that was left.

Inevitably, when I left my job, it devastated me. I couldn’t just rally and move on. I did not know how to value who I was versus what I did. What I did was who I was.

I have spent several years now living a different version of my life, where I try to apply my energy to my new husband, Anthony, and the people whom I love and care about. But I can’t make up for lost time. Most important, although I now have stepchildren, I missed having a child of my own. I am 47 years old, and Anthony and I have been trying in vitro fertilization for several years. We are still hoping.

Sometimes young women tell me they admire what I’ve done. As they see it, I worked hard for 20 years and can now spend the next 20 focused on other things. But that is not balance. I do not wish that for anyone. Even at the best times in my career, I was never deluded into thinking I had achieved any sort of rational allocation between my life at work and my life outside.

I have often wondered whether I would have been asked to be C.F.O. if I had not worked the way that I did. Until recently, I thought my singular focus on my career was the most powerful ingredient in my success. But I am beginning to realize that I sold myself short. I was talented, intelligent and energetic. It didn’t have to be so extreme. Besides, there were diminishing returns to that kind of labor.

I didn’t have to be on my BlackBerry from my first moment in the morning to my last moment at night. I didn’t have to eat the majority of my meals at my desk. I didn’t have to fly overnight to a meeting in Europe on my birthday. I now believe that I could have made it to a similar place with at least some better version of a personal life. Not without sacrifice — I don’t think I could have “had it all” — but with somewhat more harmony.

I have also wondered where I would be today if Lehman Brothers hadn’t collapsed. In 2007, I did start to have my doubts about the way I was living my life. Or not really living it. But I felt locked in to my career. I had just been asked to be C.F.O. I had a responsibility. Without the crisis, I may never have been strong enough to step away. Perhaps I needed what felt at the time like some of the worst experiences in my life to come to a place where I could be grateful for the life I had. I had to learn to begin to appreciate what was left.

At the end of the day, that is the best guidance I can give. Whatever valuable advice I have about managing a career, I am only now learning how to manage a life.

Erin Callan is the former chief financial officer of Lehman Brothers.

Sunday Review

By ERIN CALLAN

Published: March 9, 2013

Stop treating HR as event organisers!

My message to Corporate Management & Companies:

Stop making HR plan the company picnic, holiday or birthday parties!

HR is not the activities planner, nor is it a concierge or event organizer.

They do not have to be a party-pooper, but HR has actual responsibilities and meaningful things to do.
Companies have to begin looking at HR as a real job.

Unfortunately, until someone else handles the social secretary duties, HR will never be taken seriously...

Why Being a Recruiter Rocks!

I love being a recruiter.
Seriously, I think it’s the best job in the world.
Yet 80% of people who enter this industry, fail in the first 2 years, leave, and are never sighted again.
And it’s true, it is tough being a recruiter. And I believe in the modern era it’s getting even harder. During the downturn it got even worse. We all worked harder and harder, and earned less and less.
On top of that, our customers seem to resent us more than ever, as can be seen in my recent blog, ‘God I hate recruiters’.
Ironically there is a fate worse than being amongst the 80% of recruiters who fail. Yes, being an average, mediocre, ploddy recruiter who survives is real purgatory. Why? Because this job is too hard, has too many disappointments, not to be great at it. You have to be a great recruiter to reap the rewards that make it all worthwhile.
So for the top 5%, the cream, recruiting is the coolest job in the world.
Here’s why:

• Recruiting is a win/win/win: Unlike most commercial transactions, recruiting is not a win/lose scenario. If I sell you a car I aim for the highest price, you push for the lowest. One of us will feel we ‘won’, the other a bit despondent that we ‘lost’. But in the perfect recruitment scenario everybody wins. Happy client, happy candidate, happy you. This is not as trivial as it seems. There is something intensely rewarding about doing a job where everyone is grateful, everyone is excited with the outcome… and then you get paid as well!
• 

  By: Kiva Dang
  You create great outcomes: Maybe the coolest thing about being a recruiter is that this is a job where you actually make good things happen. The candidate is reluctant to go on an interview, but through your influencing skills they reluctantly go along, do fantastically well, love the job, and get hired! The client won’t see your top talent because of something they spotted in the resume, but you persist, explaining the person is better than the paper, the client relents and your talent gets the job, gets promoted and in time becomes your client!  For me, when I recruited, this was the real buzz. Making things happen. Controlling the process. I would crack open a beer on Friday and reflect. That would NOT have happened if I had not seen the opportunity and influenced the outcome. Beyond cool.
• It actually matters: And of course that leads us to another reason why recruiting rocks. What we do actually matters. I mean it really matters. Recruiters get a horrific rap sometimes, and often it’s deserved but hey, at the end of the day, we find people jobs! And that’s a good thing right? Something to be proud of. It makes an impact. We change people’s lives. We solve companies staffing issues. We help people further their career ambitions. Fantastic!
• It’s measurable: One of the beautiful things about our business is that it is so measurable. This does not suit everybody I know, but in recruiting there is nowhere to hide, and I like that. If you have the right temperament, you will thrive in this competitive environment, love the fact that you can measure yourself against your competitors and colleagues, and revel in the transparency of fee-tables and pay-by-results. Truly in our business, you eat what you kill.
• You can own your market: If you have longevity, if you maintain integrity, if you deliver service and outcomes that your customers want… you can elevate yourself to a true trusted advisor, and then recruitment becomes a beautiful, beautiful thing.  All your work is exclusive, all your candidates come via referrals and commendations, clients treat you with respect, seek your advice, bring you into the tent . You actually ‘own’ your patch and that is a wonderful place to be!

Yes it’s true. Recruiting rocks. When it all boils down, what all of us want from a great job is just two things. Fun & money. And if you’re a great recruiter you’ll get lots of both. The fun of winning, the fun of finding people jobs, the fun of working in a job that actually counts. And money? I don’t mean how much you earn, although of course that is important. I mean working in a job where you get a great return on your efforts. That is where it is at!
So if you are having a down day. Never forget: fun and money.
Recruitment rocks!

by Greg Savage from the Undercover Recruiter

Want happier employees - feed them :)

Want happier employees - feed them

Polish Labour Law - Parent Employees on longer maternity leaves

New Labour Law regulations, effective from September 2013 will make the maternity leave twice as long as it's been up to date.
The government is proud of its great idea of making it more 'attractive' to become a parent, in reality, it makes it worse.
First of all, it's not because of the fact that the current maternity is too short that women don't want to have children! - It is for fear that they won't have a job to come back to after the maternity leave. The old classic is that once you are back, you find out that your position has been taken over by your very best colleague whose manager, up to that day, were you. So what that you are protected and cannot be fired - you lost your position, your career has gone to a dead end...
The government by making it also available for 'dad employees' to take the 'one year maternity leave' exchangeable with 'mom employees' messes with the Polish social satndards. It will not work fo men in Poland to stay at home - for only 80% of their salary if they decide 2 weeks in advance before the delivery - it is not 'popular' and it;s certainly not a common practice to do so. This is not Sweden or Norway.
In view of the planned regulations it will make the situation of women on the market even worse. The recruiter having to choose between a man and a woman will have no doubts - one year of paid vacation is not appealing to any employer.

HR person, take off your mask!

Lots of HR people walk on eggshells these days.
They wear a mask.
They bury who they really are.
They’re not authentic.
They’re uncomfortable revealing parts of themselves they’d love to share with others.
The try to fit in rather than stand out.
They do this because they believe their organizations don’t really value their uniqueness.
Or, they fear they’ll get biased treatment.
And in many cases, they’re right.
However, the key to excelling, impressing and inspiring others as an HR professional lies in your ability to bring your “whole” self to work.

 That means feeling comfortable talking about that pick-up basketball game you played in the inner city on weekends instead of golf.
It means being comfortable sharing your activities in the Gay Pride events in your town.
It means speaking up and taking a stand — when no one else will — if your HR experience tells you that the brand new performance appraisal changes are just too complex and won’t work,
I will make no pretense that any of this is easy to do or will be embraced with open arms by everyone.
But you know in your heart who you are, what you believe and what’s true to you.
So act accordingly.
You cannot bury who you really are if you want to truly impress other people in HR.

If the face you always show your colleagues, your clients and your boss is a mask, one of these days there will be nothing beneath it.
That’s because when you spend too much time “shape shifting” to adapt to everyone else’s perception of you…or who everyone else wants you to be… you eventually forget who you really are.
So, don’t be a shape shifter.
Stop hiding behind a mask.
Be yourself.

After Allan Collins

Valentine's Day at the office: how not to celebrate V-Day at work

How not to celebrate V-Day at work :)

Why the best 'man' for a job is often a 'woman'

Unlike the Industrial era that was shaped by a “male advantage” where strength, aggressiveness, territorialism and competitiveness were the key qualities that were valued and led to a male hierarchy, in today’s world, success is catalyzed by high degrees of Communication, Collaboration and Coordination– competencies in which women often excel.
Communication: In today’s horizontal organizations, clear communication that crosses functions, geographies, titles and generations is critical to galvanizing teams, influencing buy-in and executing strategies. This communication is not just about contact, but connection. And connection results from being emotionally attuned to others and adjusting your own communication based on both the verbal and non-verbal messages that you receive. This type of connection only happens when leadership is willing to listen and be curious, rather than just being critical of the opinions and viewpoints of others, has the strength to show vulnerability, is always authentic, and encourages the uncensored participation of others to maximally benefit from a diversity of input. This type of emotional intelligence combined with the recognition that in this digital world, state-of-the-heart technologies trump state-of-the-art technologies can give any organization an edge. In my experience, women are exceptional at orchestrating this symphony of communication.

Collaboration: You can’t build it alone. While creating a vision is best a solitary act, in today’s vastly more socially oriented and interconnected world, executing it requires collaboration. Collaboration is built on trust, energized through encouragement of healthy conflict rather than consensus, and is continuously strengthened through coaching and development of team members. Strong collaboration yields greater problem solving, innovation and commitment to goals and purpose. It makes the company far more nimble and puts an emphasis on process. Rather than engage in collaborative opportunities competitively as some men do, women more often foster the genuine collaboration required to generate the outcomes that drive true competitive advantage.

Coordination: With uncertain economic forecasts and the rapid rate of change, restructuring and downsizings are a constant part of the process and many leaders are forced to do more with less. Keeping all the “balls in the air” to deliver the expected results and meet or beat accelerated deadlines requires massive coordination and focused execution.
While there is debate as to whether women are wired to multitask better than men, there’s no doubt that women are forced to multitask more often than men. In addition to holding full time jobs, women’s responsibilities often encompass coordinating households, kids, pets and various other duties. Results based on scientific research on multitasking demonstrate that females are better able to reflect on a problem, while continuing to juggle their other commitments, than men are. Whether acquired or learned, coordinating and executing exponentially greater tasks is an asset that every hiring manager should covet.

So what’s the bottom line?

After all, business is all about the bottom line. According to a McKinsey report, companies with more women at the top had better financial returns compared to companies with zero women at the top. A Pepperdine University study which tracked the performance of 200 of the Fortune 500 companies (that provided gender breakdown of their executives) found the correlation between high-level female executives and business success to be not only consistent, but the better a company was at promoting women, the better it tended to rank in terms of profitability.

All this begs the question as to why it is that the percentages of women in CEO roles (3%) and women in senior executive spots (about 15%) have not moved for several years? Perhaps it’s because men are still largely responsible for hiring and promoting decisions and the institutionalization of precedent is so deep that it’s hard to dislodge. This gives companies who are willing to take their two eyes off their rear view mirror an opportunity to find great female talent to exponentially increase their odds for success.

from Peter Guber via LinkedIn

6 Habits of Remarkably Likable People

They're charming. They're genuine. And they can make an entire room full of people smile.

When you meet someone, after, "What do you do?" you're out of things to say. You suck at small talk, and those first five minutes are tough because you're a little shy and a little insecure.
But you want to make a good impression. You want people to genuinely like you.
Here's how remarkably likeable people do it:
They lose the power pose.
I know: Your parents taught you to stand tall, square your shoulders, stride purposefully forward, drop your voice a couple of registers, and shake hands with a firm grip.
It's great to display nonverbal self-confidence, but go too far and it seems like you're trying to establish your importance. That makes the "meeting" seem like it's more about you than it is the other person--and no one likes that.
Next time you meet someone, relax, step forward, tilt your head towards them slightly, smile, and show that you're the one who is honored by the introduction--not them.
We all like people who like us. If I show you I'm genuinely happy to meet you, you'll instantly start to like me. (And you'll show that you do, which will help calm my nerves and let me be myself.)
They embrace the power of touch.
Nonsexual touch can be very powerful. (Yes, I'm aware that sexual touch can be powerful too.) Touch can influence behavior, increase the chances of compliance, make the person doing the touching seem more attractive and friendly.
Go easy, of course: Pat the other person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder. Make it casual and nonthreatening.
Check out Clinton's right-hand-shakes-hands-left-hand-touches-Mandela's-forearm-a-second-later handshake in the link above and tell me, combined with his posture and smile, that it doesn't come across as genuine and sincere.
Think the same won't work for you? Try this: The next time you walk up behind a person you know, touch them lightly on the shoulder as you go by. I guarantee you'll feel like a more genuine greeting was exchanged.
Touch breaks down natural barriers and decreases the real and perceived distance between you and the other person--a key component in liking and in being liked.
They whip out their social jiu-jitsu.
You meet someone. You talk for 15 minutes. You walk away thinking, "Wow, we just had a great conversation. She is awesome."
Then, when you think about it later, you realize you didn't learn a thing about the other person.
Remarkably likeable people are masters at Social Jiu-Jitsu, the ancient art of getting you to talk about yourself without you ever knowing it happened. SJJ masters are fascinated by every step you took in creating a particularly clever pivot table, by every decision you made when you transformed a 200-slide PowerPoint into a TED Talk-worthy presentation, if you do say so yourself...
SJJ masters use their interest, their politeness, and their social graces to cast an immediate spell on you.
And you like them for it.
Social jiu-jitsu is easy. Just ask the right questions. Stay open-ended and allow room for description and introspection. Ask how, or why, or who.
As soon as you learn a little about someone, ask how they did it. Or why they did it. Or what they liked about it, or what they learned from it, or what you should do if you're in a similar situation.
No one gets too much recognition. Asking the right questions implicitly shows you respect another person's opinion--and, by extension, the person.
We all like people who respect us, if only because it shows they display great judgment.
(Kidding. Sort of.)
They whip out something genuine.
Everyone is better than you at something. Let them be better than you.
Too many people when they first meet engage in some form of penis-measuring contest. Crude reference but one that instantly calls to mind a time you saw two alpha male master-of-the business-universe types whip out their figurative rulers. (Not literally, of course. I hope you haven't seen that.)
Don't try to win the "getting to know someone" competition. Try to lose. Be complimentary. Be impressed. Admit a failing or a weakness.
You don't have to disclose your darkest secrets. If the other person says, "We just purchased a larger facility," say, "That's awesome. I have to admit I'm jealous. We've wanted to move for a couple years but haven't been able to put together the financing. How did you pull it off?"
Don't be afraid to show a little vulnerability. People may be (momentarily) impressed by the artificial, but people sincerely like the genuine.
Be the real you. People will like the real you.
They ask for nothing.
You know the moment: You're having a great conversation, you're finding things in common... and then bam! Someone plays the networking card.
And everything about your interaction changes.
Put away the hard-charging, goal-oriented, always-on kinda persona. If you have to ask for something, find a way to help the other person, then ask if you can.
Remarkably likeable people focus on what they can do for you--not for themselves.
They "close" genuinely.
"Nice to meet you," you say, nodding once as you part. That's the standard move, one that is instantly forgettable.
Instead go back to the beginning. Shake hands again. Use your free hand to gently touch the other person's forearm or shoulder. Say, "I am really glad I met you." Or say, "You know, I really enjoyed talking with you." Smile: Not that insincere salesperson smile that goes with, "Have a nice day!" but a genuine, appreciative smile.
Making a great first impression is important, but so is making a great last impression.
And they accept it isn't easy.
All this sounds simple, right? It is. But it's not easy, especially if you're shy. The standard, power pose, "Hello, how are you, good to meet you, good seeing you," shuffle feels a lot safer.
But it won't make people like you.
So accept it's hard. Accept that being a little more deferential, a little more genuine, a little more complimentary and a little more vulnerable means putting yourself out there. Accept that at first it will feel risky.
But don't worry: When you help people feel a little better about themselves--which is reason enough--they'll like you for it.
And you'll like yourself a little more, too.

Jeff Haden, Inc Magazine

How to use your friends to get a job :)

A New York Times article reports that employees hired as the result of a referral are 15 percent less likely to quit and that they “perform better, stay longer and are quicker to integrate” on the job. What company wouldn’t want to identify this type of candidate?

how to do it?
Let people know what you do
Grow your network and keep conversations alive
Demonstrate your expertise via social media
Volunteer for opportunities 


careerguidetips.com 

How To Become An Expert In Just About Anything in HR – Fast!

Taken from Success in HR - by Alan Collins

1.  Get real.   

It starts with you, so drop the excuses.
Pinpoint the competency you want to improve. Is it labor relations, organization development, compensation, talent acquisition, or using social media technology in HR?
Be specific.  Nail it down.  Then accept that you need to improve in this area.
Don’t be a defensive little jerk or try to rationalize it away.  Instead, get feedback and detailed information so you can discover where there are opportunities to grow your expertise.

2.  Get a plan. 

Lay out a written, detailed plan.
70% of the best development occurs the job, so brainstorm tasks and activities you can implement within the framework of your current role.
These could be project assignments or temporary fill-in opportunities to gain experience first-hand.
Then, resolve to starting cutting the crap from your life.  Mindless TV watching. Surfing the web. Bar hopping.  Start freeing up precious time for your development.

3.  Get role models.   

Seek out mentors, coaches, peers, consultants, retirees or former employees.  Pick multiple role models, each of whom excels at one thing you want to improve rather than looking for one person with the whole package.
When working with them, reduce what they do into a set of principles, best practices or rules of thumb that you can use, document and apply.  In my labor relations example, my role models were my boss and two other “mentors” she connected me with who had extensive labor relations experience.

4.  Get the “bible.” 

Every skill or competency has one or more books that has been written about it.
Get and read them all.  Go to Amazon and buy them either in print, for your kindle or on audio.
Absorb one book a week until you’ve gone through them all.  Then re-read them.  Going through them a second time will begin to cement the information.
I wound up accumulating over 40 books on labor relations and found myself constantly referring to them and re-reading them for years.

5.  Get and stay up to date.

Read magazines, blogs, newsletters.  Also devour relevant articles in HR Magazine, Workforce, HR Executive, Business Week, and Fortune as part of your regular diet.  If you travel a lot, tear out articles or bookmark blogs or websites to read on your flight.

6.  Get alerted.

Google alerts is a great way to stay up to the minute on key trends, emerging issues or hot topics.
Let’s say you want to know everything about “health care cost containment” or “leadership development” or “talent management.”  Put these key words in google alerts and you’ll get updates on these topics when something new is posted online.  It’ll be sent directly to your e-mail address. You can set up as many topics and you want…and can choose to be alerted once a day, a week or month.  Your call.
Takes 5-10 minutes to set up.

7.  Get in a class.

Locate seminars, conferences, workshops or webinars.  These can be in or outside your organization.
Find one that is taught by a guru, consultant or author in the field. You want an expert  so that you can turn their experience into your knowledge.
It would be great if the session is recorded.  That way you can turn your car or gym into a mobile learning center.

8.  Get a partner.

You will learn and grow faster with a buddy.
If you can find someone working on the same skill, you can share learnings and support each other.
Taking turns teaching each other the new ideas you’ve acquired is one of the best ways of cementing your learning.

9.  Get in an association or club.

You can shortcut your learning curve dramatically by becoming a member of a specific HR association and attending their conferences.
These can be at either the national, state, regional or city levels.  For example, if you’re looking to improve your organization development competency, the OD Network is your ticket.
There are similar specialized groups for just about any HR area.
You’ll make dozens and dozens of important and beneficial contacts.
Most associations have archives of tapes from past years’ events, so you can “attend” two, five, even ten years of conferences as if a time machine was at your disposal.

10.  Get in LinkedIn groups.

Whatever specialty in HR you’re interested in, there are at least a couple LinkedIn groups for you.
Joining them enables you to instantly create a “learning” network of like-minded HR professionals interested in your topic.
In addition, you can post questions, get fast answers and post an idea to pre-test it before you run it by your boss or go off to implement it.

11.  Get into sharing.

Get in the habit of regularly sharing what you’ve learned.
It could be sharing what you’ve learned from an HR seminar at your staff meeting.
Or providing an e-mail summary to your boss.
Or doing do a lunch and learn with some colleagues.
Or creating your own blog and posting short articles on your experiences as you go.
Knowing beforehand that you’ll be teaching something to others forces you to learn more deeply.

12.  Get feedback…continuously.

As you progress, don’t be afraid to get feedback from your clients, mentors and your boss.
As I was improving my labor relations expertise, I solicited feedback from Plant Managers (my clients), field HR leaders (colleagues) and my boss.
I told them to be brutally candid in their comments.
Then I listened.  I didn’t rebut. I took notes.  I said: Thank you.
And that’s all it took.
To conclude, if you want to achieve your full potential in HR and become the captain of your own career, you can’t afford to leave your development to chance.
So get started now.
Decide on an HR competency area you’d like to grow or become an expert in.
Pick 3-4 of the items above to start with.
Then start making it happen.
One year from now you’ll be happy you did.
Onward!

Jobs That Make The World A Worse Place . Agree?

Jobs That Make The World A Worse Place  from JobsMonster

Dull job postings, only in Poland?

I've gone through thousands of dull job postings on the Web, wondering is it only typical for Poland?
List of requirements, list of expectations, bulleted one after another. People still have to read them anyway if they want to aply and eventually find a job. But because of the dullness potential employees send over hundreds of CVs in reply to thousands of dull job postings not even bothering to remember the name of the company they apply to. This is sad. I myself found out that I haven't seen any interesting, appealing and well designed job ad for a very long time. Unless it is a foreign one. Written, prepared and posted abroad. Does this mean we as Poles are so desperate for work that it is enough to post anything and we still be interested? Perhaps.
Maybe it is a good idea to tell your recruites that their job ads suck? After you've been told whether they want you or nor, that is :)